rain dance

the fast tempo'ed cadence of the rain mixed with the medley of quick-fired thoughts in my mind is making it impossible for me to sleep. it's not bad enough i have to be up in 5 hours, and at school for 9; but my body as of late is used to an "extended" sleeping period of sorts.

i should be exhausted. i've prayed for just about everyone i know. i've laid down all of my worries and hesitations and fears and insecurities at the feet of the Lord, asking him to take them until morning. i've broken out in hives, currently on my left cheekbone. and i've laid, still, for an hour with no success.

i just hear the pat-pat-pat-pat of the steady drip of rain down the gutters next to my window. much quicker than my pulse, and although typically soothing, is not above causing anxiety tonight.

to not risk turning into an emotional mess as we speak, at further detriment to my slumber, i will leave with this confession. i, am scared.