taking the long way home.

16 But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed. -Luke 5:16

Much unlike the time I spend in the states, I've been doing a lot of reading, both in the word and in two books I'm currently reading. I'm not going to lie, all of it has been extremely challenging material. The Bible isn't a "have it your way," sort of book. It speaks very explicitly about how we should live and love. And more often than not, I find myself reading the words and then doing pretty much the opposite. love your neighbor as yourself, and then I find myself annoyed when I try to take a nap with 10 sweet little neighbors playing loudly in my living room. Forgetting they don't have a living room to spend time in.

I read this verse this morning, about Jesus withdrawing from the crowds, and finding a place by himself to pray. It's sort of hard to do that here, when you share a room with two other girls and a property with about 70+ other people. Do not get me wrong: I love it!!! I'm just saying, it is difficult to make that a priority when there isn't that lonely place to withdraw to.

I'm learning there is a balance you must maintain, one that changes shape for each season of your life. In my most recent season in Nashville, so much of my worship time was structured and organized, and I didnt have to find time each day, because I already had carved it out. This new season leads me into a time I need to be like even more like Jesus, not only how He loves, but also how he withdrew from crowds to pray.

I'm learning lots here, and I'm by no means perfect. I'm not striving for perfect. Perfection, not only unattainable, requires no grace. I'm striving for each day to bring me one step closer to looking like Jesus. I'm glad He doesn't desire perfection from me; He'd be sorely disappointed. Thenk you Lord for grace.

Also, prayer request: for several years, I've been getting hives for no apparent reason. Today, they sort of came on full force and my whole chest and neck broke out in small, itchy hives. My jawline, nose, palms, and forearms have also been incurrably itchy, but what concerns me is that my chest feels tight, as if it is something ive ingested. I have a constant desire to pop my chest and back hoping to relieve the pressure, but its almost like a burning, tight pain. Please be praying whatever it is goes away,and that my body is protected from future attacks. I've only eaten food that I've prepared, and no street food (sad, I know!), so if it is food related, it has to be something with the water (what we drink is purified,) or with produce (which I don't eat the skin, and wash with soap and water). Anyway, please just be praying as its more uncomfortable than anything.

love you all, mean it!