just give me jesus

i come empty; no witty banter, no clever hook.  i'm usually really good at taking familiar, daily-life situations and making them relate to some profound aspect of faith.  or i'm really bad at it and i've just fooled myself.  regardless, i come with no agenda, with no metaphor, with no interesting plot.

but as i lay down for bed tonight, i say this: just give me jesus.

even in the midst of summer vacay (which is way, way, WAY too short), i've felt the busy-ness bug. do this. complete this. make this. cook this. read this.  very little enjoy this.  and in the moments that i spend doing nothing, i feel guilty. i should be reading, praying, writing, working, exercising, you name it.  i turned on the TV today for one of the first times and watched a marathon just because.  i've had nearly 6 weeks of summer, and its the first time i've done that.  and i felt guilty every second.

its hard to rest. and its hard not to feel guilty when i do.  and its even harder that in this time of rest, i often feel like there is still much to do and be done.  and its hard when i keep going and keep doing, because i know that this is the time of rest, and it's only going to get worse!

all of that is neither here nor there.

you can have all this mess,
just give me jesus.