fortunately, we had a snow day on friday, and with today off for MLK, Jr. day, my weekend had doubled in size. apparently, my sleep patterns had too. at one point early in the weekend, I had counted 25 hours of sleep in a 48 hour period... just 5 hours before going to bed again! all i know, was that my body, mind, and spirit has desperately needed the rest, and He is faithful to provide. aside from a babysitting gig, helping a friend lead sunday school, and two church services, i have hardly done anything outside of my house, (or outside of making food and doing dishes, but i digress). truth be told, i'm still in my pi's and it's 1 p.m.! granted i am gym-bound and then to the grocery, and i have spent the morning reading, worshiping, praying, and making the world's best smoothie (1/2 a mango, 1 whole ripe banana, 3/4 cup (or-so) of pineapple in its own juice, and some ice (sonic ice is the best!). blend and enjoy. thank me later).
God has also been teaching me a lot about obedience (which is how we will segue into repentance, in case the post seemed a little non-sequitar). yesterday at church, i walked past the nursery and thought, hmm. i should check to see if they need any extra volunteers today. i quickly talked myself out of it because i haven't had a service in a while in which i wasn't serving in one capacity or another and thought it just might be nice to really participate in the heart of our worship service. so i kept walking, and told myself if they made an announcement, i would come volunteer.
well what do you know? they announced they needed 2 volunteers ... i lean down to grab my bag and my water bottle ... for the 2- and 3-year-olds. i put my stuff right back down under my seat. i didn't really want to deal with the crazy two's and three's this morning. quickly, two other volunteers stood, and i breathed a sigh of relief. for about 5 seconds, before i realized how terribly selfish i was.
twice, i disobeyed God. in a span of maybe 5 minutes. there was no rooster to remind me of how i denied jesus, just the conviction in my heart that left me feeling so sad and selfish. he prompted me to check on a need before anyone even knew there was one, and i kept walking. then, he asked me to fill it, and i hesitated.
i'm thankful God is a God of second (or third, or seventy-seven) chances, but that doesn't mean i get to choose when i should obey Him or listen to His promptings. for so long, i've been asking to hear His voice, to know that He is indeed speaking to me. and the times He does, i don't respond in a way that glorifies Him. it's no wonder why we question if He is speaking; because when He is we either tune Him out, or we choose ourselves over Him anyway. my heart is so repentant over my disobedience, but
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Rhi!! I was setting up a blog today for my Instructional Technology class and found your blog that I joined when you were in Haiti. I have thought of you often and hoped that you are doing well. You were having a hard time finding a job the last time we spoke so I am delighted to see that you are teaching Kindergarten! I am in my third year of schooling to teach middle school math. I got my Associate's from VolState and am now attending Austin Peay. I am so encouraged by your faith in the Lord. I always admired that about you. Anywho, just wanted to pop in and say hello. Hope this message finds you well! Much love! -Kristin (from Athens, by the way, in case you were wondering!) :)
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