Sunday, May 1, 2011

because He lives

walking into church, still mostly embittered from friday and exhausted from saturday, i couldn't help but find comfort in this long-loved truth-teller:

because He lives
i can face tomorrow
because He lives
all fear is gone.
because i know
who holds the future
and life is worth the living
just because he lives.

i may not know where i'm living, or how i'm going to afford it. i may not know where i'm working after this month is over. i may not know how i'm going to fit all the things i need to do into this month; but fear thee not. because of Jesus' life, death, and resurrection, one thing is for certain: my life is in His hands. i have entrusted Him to protect and provide; and my worrying about it is not doing either of us a lick of good. (that doesn't mean i won't worry, or that i am all of the sudden fearless; just trying to walk in that direction).

although i still don't fully understand why everything always seems to pile up at once, i do understand that because of Christ we do not have to live in fear of the unknown. while obstacles and distractions and frustrations and discouragement often bring us down, as long as they drive us to jesus, they are part of that whole "all things work together for our good," thing that the apostle Paul was adamant about.

"be aware that when you go to Jesus for help, you will always give to, and get from, far more than you bargained for," warns Tim Keller, in his book King's Cross (as quoted by Pastor Jim in today's message).

which reminds me of a few details from friday that i not-so-humbly decided to leave out (actually, i couldn't find where they would fit, so i gave them the boot; only to find them back here in part deux).

as i was driving somewhere in between bellevue and the 1st or 5th stop i made friday evening, i began to really worry about my car and its new noisy shake. i began to pray, "please Lord, please don't let my car fail me. preserve this car; i can't afford to lose it. i don't know what i would do if it quit on me."

at that moment, it almost felt like discipline. "this car doesn't belong to you; you know that, right?"

i humble agreed. "i know, Lord. you give and you can take away." regardless of the (impaired) state of the car, that stung. think what it would be like to be car-less; we've become so reliant, could you imagine what it would be like to have to go without? it made me sick just thinking about it; but as much as i didn't want to hear it, i knew He was right.

so two seconds after i fell up the stairs (i am just that talented and graceful) (remember, the first second was dump truck deja-vu), i immediately felt Him say, "you're phone, too. you've gotta be prepared to give these up. don't put your trust in your things." ugh. strike two, but again, He's right.

discipline and rebuke are never fun; but its in those moments that we really have no footing to argue with God, and He is able to really point out areas that need work in a way that we will recognize them and just leave our foot in our mouth.

remember those words of Tim Keller. be prepared to hand over more to Jesus than you expect. and if at all possible, do so gracefully and joyfully. i imagine that would be a lot less painful.


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